Short jokes
What does Fortnite and real life have in common?
They both lost their tower.
Roast
You have such a big forehead it has a 6 pack on it!
Why can't an orphan live peacefully?
Technoblade: As a ghost, he could locate all orphans within 2 weeks.
What’s big, pink, long and makes my 12 year old girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth?
Her miscarriage.
Papyrus: Sans! I heard that a HUMAN has fallen!
Sans: And you gotta bone to pick with 'em?
Pro tip kids, you CAN hit an orphan because they can't cry to their parents!
There was a kid being mean to another kid at an orphanage. The kid said, "Stop!" but the mean one said, "What are you going to do? Call your mommy?"
Q: Why did the trans man only eat salads?
A: Because he is a "herbefore."
My uncle hid my weed, so I hid his wheelchair.
What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
My girlfriend left a note on the TV saying, "This isn't working!" I don't know what she's talking about, the TV works perfectly fine.
My arm has a different texture than the rest of me, lol.
Do you work at Subway? Because you turn my 6 inch into a footlong.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
What is the difference between an orphan and a cat?
The cat is actually cute.
What do you call a fudge packer who has special needs?
A gay black male that has Down Syndrome.
Are you Hiroshima? Because I want to drop my bomb inside you.
Why are Mexican families so big?
They don’t know how to put a condom on.
Roses are red, violets are blue, when The Oh Hellos saw you they said "Shoo!"