Short jokes
If you don’t know what introspection is, you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
What do you call a planet that poops? Uranus.
Did you hear about the fortune telling dwarf that escaped from prison?
Reports say there's a small medium at large!
How did number 1 kindly make number 2?
I got my was kicked, let's be friends?
You give some people 2.54 centimeters, and they take 1.6 kilometers.
Your momma is so ugly that she went out as herself for Halloween.
I named my dog Syndrome, so when he sits on my couch I say, “Get down, Syndrome!”
The doctor told me I was so retarded, I was required to ride two wheelchairs.
What does a broken down vegetable say?
I need new wheels.
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1st Person: Do you want to know something funny?
2nd Person: Yeah, sure!
1st Person: I don’t know, I’m German!
Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?
What's better than poo?
Curiosity killed the cat.
But for a while, I was a suspect.
MooMooMooMoo
How do crazy people get through a forest?
They take the psycho-path!
What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?
An irrelephant.
What did the shoes say to the pants?
"SUP, BRITCHES!"
What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?
A small medium at large!
Knock knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya who? Sorry, I prefer Google.