Short jokes
The granddaughter wanted to see granny. She killed herself.
I never knew how to use a boomerang, until it hit me.
When you send nudes to your Roblox gf and your uncle’s phone sounds with a text tone...
A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.
Do your buses run on time?
No, they run on diesel.
What do my baby and dinosaurs have in common? They are both dead.
What's the difference between a baby and putty?
You can only eat one.
Beau Ruse is Gay.
You know where I get my soda? Mini-soda.
What has more brains than the Columbine students? The wall behind them, xD.
"Are you taco to me? I nacho friend."
Miss Stephen likes kids like she likes wine: 15 years and in isolation.
Why did Miss Stephen get divorced? She didn't float, too.
Diabetic wives are like Cillit Bang. Squeeze them a bit and bang! The bed is gone.
What do you get when a cow is caught in an earthquake?
You get a milkshake!
Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo.
Kid: Why?
Dad: I clean up animal s*** at the zoo.
What happened to the gator when he walked into the hospital?
He became Gatorade.
What happened to the alligator when he held a GPS?
He became a navigator.
What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a hostage?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
I'm sorry for all the fish puns. I feel so GILL-ty.