Short jokes
What is a pirate's favorite letter?
A letter from his family; he hadn't seen them in years.
I'm dead! 😂💀💀
What's so special about bullets?
They do work after they are fired.
My dad always told me I should sing tenor. Ten or twelve miles away.
Batman vs Superman?
I'll never forget how my grandmother died. "This lemonade tastes like bleach..."
My mother said I'm sexy. I said no, I have cancer.
Why didn’t the construction worker build a bridge?
He was scared to get across.
Why is the elephant headed God the true God?
Because he doesn't exist!
How do you get 50 babies into a car?
You blend them.
I was at the store during a storm one time. I guess you could say it was story.
What is the opposite of salt water?
Pepper water.
Don’t worry if you have a stroke.
You’ll be all right.
Only one band is capable of affording the insurance on supercars. UB40!
What's the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile?
One is Catholic.
My wife's dyslexic, but hey, nobody's perfect.
Damn, DIN just went over me and I'm trying to figure out what it is. A camel's dick.
Babies can spread a nasty smell,
especially when you haven't fed them for a month.
Are you in the alphabet 'cause I wanna give you the D.
You'll end up DEAD if you don't stop COFFIN!!!