Short jokes
Motivational quote for today: if you think you're dumb, you're probably overestimating your intellectual abilities...
Motivational Quote for today: If you're feeling tired and ugly today, cheer up, you probably won't feel tired tomorrow morning...
Did you hear Palpatine is sewing Nike?
Stole his slogan, just do it!
How did Anakin get away with cheating?
By choking on his wife!
What does Yoda say when he’s at the strip club?
"Dirty bitch, you are."
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.
Why do orphans hate hide and seek?
Their parents went to play hide and seek years ago.
America Twin Tower: "Hey, have you seen the Malaysian Twin Tower? I have, but only from 1971 to 2001."
Malaysian Twin Tower: "I STOOD LONGER!"
What do British politics and transgender people have in common?
Both aren't what they used to be...
Is someone who is tardy again actually "retardy"?
Yo mama so dumb, when the bartender said "beer is on the house" she grabbed a ladder.
"Just ditched a woman. Feelin' good!" -Techno
"When God sends me to hell... I want him to hesitate." -Techno
Fat person: "Hey, what's up?"
Friend: "Your blood pressure!"
The Twilight fanbase.
What's a rapper's favorite kind of tree?
CYPRESS HILL.
What's a rapper's favorite instrument?
The MIC-DROPHONE!
Why did the rapper refuse to play cards?
Because he was tired of dealing with all the jokers.
Why did the rapper go to the beach?
To drop some FLOW-TIDE!
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
A rhyme scheme that's all about the Benjamins!