Short jokes
Me walking in to the office:
Principal: Tell me what you did?
Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was an end portal...
Your hairline be going up and down like a Formula 1 car!
Your hairline design was used as the Batman logo!
Why doesn't anyone play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
Crazy? I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once...
Are you Hiroshima? Because I want to drop my bomb inside you.
If I don't get a partner for Christmas this year, mistletoe won't be the only thing hanging from the ceiling.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after dumping his first boyfriend?
o o a a.
Me and my girlfriend were walking in the woods.
Her: I am scared!
Me: What do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.
My girlfriend called me a cocksucker, but hey, 20 dollars is 20 dollars.
What is the difference between a pencil and a woman?
At least one has a point.
What is the difference between me and food?
Food has a use.
I called my guy friend a cock-sucker the other day. He replied with, "Hey, 20 bucks is 20 bucks."
"White people can't jump..."
"You must not have seen the Twin Towers on 9/11."
What does a furry call a sexy furry?
A foxy lady!
Said the man angered to his wife:
"Now stop the damn suicide tries! Just look at the gas bill!?"
I told a girl she was cute, and she said, "Aw, tysm."
How does she know I have that?
Bro, go work at McDonald's. Your hairline inspired their logo!
Wanna know the last words of the south tower?
"HAHA LOOK AT YOU! IMAGINE BEING HIT YOU L BOZO!"