Short jokes
I believe everything in the Bible until I read about the Jew giving out the free fish.
How many Kardashians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One really small one and one really small black guy.
ISIS recently brought out a new shampoo.
Head and Shoulders!
I guess making 9/11 jokes at the airport is better than shouting "He's got a gun!" at the airport.
What’s the difference between women and cars?
At least cars retain some of their value after getting wrecked.
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
Neither one of them, they eat out.
What do you call it when two transgender midgets have sex?
And microtransaction.
A genealogist looks at the family tree.
A gynecologist looks up the family bush.
What do you do when a woman is choking?
Back up a couple inches.
Why did the dick go insane?
Someone kept messing with his head.
What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common?
They’ll eventually get laid by a Mexican.
How do you get a black girl to suck your meat?
Put barbecue sauce on it.
How can you tell your best friend is gay?
His meat tastes like shit.
Why does JD Vance have strained diplomatic relations with Turkey?
He took away their ottoman!
Just give me my money (clap clap clap).
How can a pimp save money in buying condoms for his stable?
Answer: Have his hoes wash and rinse them after every use.
Why did Shakespeare only write using quills?
Pencils confused him: 2b or not 2b.
What’s missing from an orphan's iPad?
The home button.
Why don't you have a life?
Because you're ugly.
What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.