Short jokes
Have you ever had duck sausage? No? How about you duck on down and get yourself some!
An e-girl went to go high five a tree, but the tree left her hanging.
If you think I sound sexy, just reply "sexy."
How many people does it take to wash the dishes?
Only Juan.
I suffered The Great Depression.
When you met her first before your parents met each other. (In the case of your mom dating her dad).
You wanna know what's the difference between a girl and a refrigerator? "A refrigerator doesn't moan when I put my meat in it."
What flies around the school at night?
Alpha-bats!
What do you call a shoe made out of a banana?
A slipper.
What’s the German word for BRA? Keep two from floppin'.
How many letters are in the English Alphabet?
Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.
What do queer guys call hemorrhoids? Speed bumps!
Two chinamen walk into a bar. The landlord says, "Why the same face?"
Why did God give women legs?
1. To look at.
2. To wrap around your neck when you’re eating her out.
Why do dogs lick their balls? Because they can.
What does 2016 and 2020 have in common?
A monkey caused worldwide outrage.
Did you hear about the racist sprinkler?
It kept going: "Spick spick spick Chink chink chink!"
Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble?
He got caught playing with his Privates!
What do you call a German lesbian?
A krautmuncher.
Orphans and punching bags are almost the same.
They both get hit, but a punching bag is still wanted.