Short jokes
So I left my mom with my baby, and I was terrified when I came back; the wheelchair was in the water.
I'M SHORTTT!
Why can't orphans say "mommy: me?" Because the fosters said no.
What does a pickle look like a p*nis?
What do you call an Indian gymnast? Balance Singh.
What is Stephen Hawking's least favorite movie?
Standing Tall.
What do you call the Gray Man in an electric chair? Fried Fish.
Why do Vampires like virgins?
Because eating a sandwich would be so much more appealing knowing no one fucked it.
What do visiting Goatman's Bridge and a bungee jumping accident have in common?
You hear a snap, and suddenly you're falling from a bridge.
W2S, you stinky, stanky fad. Seeing your disstracks really makes me wanna fap.
What do sexists and WNBA fans have in common?
There's enough of them to acknowledge their existence.
(Just a joke, no offense.)
What did the racist serial killer say to the cop?
“Wait, you’re getting paid?”
*trigger alert*
Why did the racist cop shut down the space brothel?
Because there were too many black holes.
I went to the store and bought Minecraft Java Edition.
I found a village, burned it down, and then I went home and played Minecraft.
Sometimes when I think I'm ugly, I just think of my sister and it makes me feel better.
Are you going to SHOWCON?
What’s SHOWCON?
Show con these nuts.
I have 5 fingers and the middle one is for you
80s (DYM 84)
Good Morning! Have a Great Day!
#Ijustwokeup
What's the most difficult thing about being a pediatric surgeon?
Keeping the scalpel steady while masturbating.