Shes jokes

Your mama so fat, when she put a leg in the car, the wheels deflated.

He: I am 60 and I have to slog 12 hours a day to make a living. Do you call it life?

She: I am 28 and still a virgin, do you call it life?

How did Helen Keller know she went to hell?

She didn't.

What did Helen Keller do when she fell down a well?

Screamed till her hands fell off.

I was just sitting down when all of a sudden she screamed, "Help!"

Your momma is so ugly that she went out as herself for Halloween.

Yo mama is so classless, she could be a Marxist utopia.

Yo mama so fat, when she went up the elevator, the World Trade Center collapsed.

Your mama is so fat, she only knows three words: KFC.

My dad and I were talking and my cat left the room.

So I said, "I guess she wasn't feline it."

My dad said, "You've got to be kitten me, that was purrfect!"

I said, "Literally."

Why did Sally fall off the swing?

Because she is a dumb b*tch!

Why did Little Sally get hurt while playing soccer?

Because she fell into a minefield.

Yo mama is so slow, when she stepped on the highway they had to order a crane to come move her from starting traffic.

She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez. Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed!

Yo mama is so ugly, when she got raped, the rapist was the one getting PTSD!

Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor slapped your grandma.

Your mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.

About to go on a date.

But she was late.

So I got some tape.

And eventually punished her with rape.

When a deaf girl master baits, does she use the other hand to moan?

In the hospital, I saw a girl with cancer trying to sleep. The ICU was going beep beep beep. I think that's why she can't sleep, so I turned it off. She's asleep forever now. Nighty night.