Sex

Sex jokes

Condom

  • What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a great year.

  • 3
  • Expulsion

  • Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.

    Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!

  • 0
  • Morgue

  • Once upon a time, there was a man named Daniel. He was blind and deaf, and he worked at a morgue.

    So one time, poor Dan got confused and started having sex with the rotting corpse.

    He then came home and thought he was at the morgue, so he started disintegrating his sleeping wife.

  • 0
  • Morgue

  • Once upon a time, there was a man named Daniel. He was blind and deaf, and he worked at a morgue.

    So, one time poor Dan got confused and started having sex with the rotting corpse.

    He then came home and thought he was at the morgue, so he started disintegrating his sleeping wife.

  • 2
  • Man

  • Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex. They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.

  • 0
  • Girlfriend

  • My girlfriend passed away recently.

    At the funeral, everyone was shocked about it.

    Still, even when dead, she is the best shag I've ever known.

  • 0
  • Boob

  • What do boobs and toys have in common?

    Kids end up playing with toys, but adults end up playing with boobs.

  • 1