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Say this to someone who is fat that you don't like (make sure he's a virgin):
"You're so fat you can sell shaaade!! That's why you're a virgin and you masturbaaate!!! Yeah, I've see you, touching your 1 centimetre and if you have a gf she's is a cheater!!"
Make sure to say "shaaade" not "shade". And say "maturbaaate" (also try to say a D not a T in maturbaaate) not "masturbate".
Little boy: Momma?
Mom: Yes, my dear.
Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's.
Mom: Why!?
Little boy: Just to see if their ice cream machine is actually broken.
A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."
Jantje goes on a walk with his grandmother. Jantje sees 1 dollar on the street and picks it up.
The grandmother says: "Hey, Jantje! No picking up things from the floor! They are ugly and bad!"
Then they keep walking. The grandmother slips and asks Jantje to help her stand up. Jantje answers: "No! Everything on the ground is ugly and bad."
Cashew, see, I'm nuts about you!?
Why do orphans go on holiday?
To see what family is like.
What did the parents say to the orphans?
"YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
EVERYONE:
"My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"
If anyone can see Alya KUHL please tell me! I love and miss her...
A girl walks up to her blind friend who she had not seen in a while and says: "Long time no see!"
When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...
But they know you're blind.
Why can't we see or sense kamikazes' bombs?
They're out of plane sight.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell them to clap until they see their parents.
What do you call a nazi that can’t see?
A nozi.
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To show he had guts.
Why did the other hedgehog cross the road? To see his flat mate.
Reese's.
Reese's who? Re-sees with deez nuts!
Go up to someone and say, "I'm sorry for your loss," and see what they do.
I have 206 bones, but when I see you, I have 207.
Stupid Mary Jane was swinging on the swing.
Her momma said, "Stupid Mary Jane, don't swing so high, the boys will see your underwear!"
Stupid Mary Jane laughed and laughed. She knew she wasn't wearing no underwear.