School jokes
I love telling stories as theatrical plays. When we had a free dress day near Christmas, my teacher dressed up as a reindeer, so I got my teacher involved... and shot her.
Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.
When you're the only one bullying the weird kid and you're absent on the day he shoots up the school. ̄\_(ツ)_/ ̄
Why did the girl study in the tree? She wanted a higher education.
Teacher: This assignment is big.
Student (male): I have something that's big.
Teacher: Yeah, your forehead.
Rainbows top the class, as they always score with flying colors.
Why did the pirate kids ride the short bus to school?
Because they were retarrrrrrrrrded.
I came home from school one day and told my cat a kid at school said I was an idiot and told me to go kick rocks, so I did, except I kicked him, not the rocks, and I called him the idiot for not moving out of the way.
How to escape your black school teacher in detention?
(Easy)
Turn off the lights!
There was a solar eclipse at school and we missed it, but it was alright. Your mum went to NASA and recreated it herself.
What did the math teacher write on his party invitations?
Be there or B2.
What do you call a priest that graduated from law school?
Father-in-law.
What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?
KMS.
Are you a white van? Because I would love to put children in you.
What's the worst thing that can happen to schools?
Quiet kids.
Why do orphans hate health ed at school?
Their parents can't opt them out of it.
I saw a monkey outside of school and said, "Look, a monkey!" I got expelled the next day.
(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents
You know that at Walmart they have backpacks next to the guns? Well, I thought that it was nice to see the bags next to the school supplies.
My (at the time) boyfriend told our chemistry teacher that blood is corrosive to steel.
Anyways, my sharpener isn’t working because the blade has been too badly damaged from something else...