Scandal

Scandal Jokes

Sale

Michael Jackson was recently sighted at Target. Why? The sale was all boys' pants half off!

Reply

I asked Michael Jackson when did he lose his virginity. He just replied with "HEHE!"

Cheat

How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her? She found another woman's lipstick on his knuckles.

Priest

What do you call a priest in a room full of naked boys?

A colonoscopy.

Lego

What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?

They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.

Drink

Trump goes to a bar and sees Hillary Clinton. He goes up to her and says, "Buy me a drink." She replies angrily, "Get your own drinks. What kind of a man asks a woman to buy him a drink?" Trump responds, "The kind that will grab you by the p***y."

People

I was asking people who knew Trump if he would win a second term. Stormy said, "No way, he doesn't have two in him!"

Nun

Three nuns are talking, and the first nun says, "You would never believe what I discovered." Intrigued, the others signal her to continue. "I found a phone in the priest's room," said the first nun. "Oh, that's nothing," said the second one. "I found condoms in one of his drawers." said the second one. "What did you do with them?" said the first nun. Pridefully, the second nun responds with, "I poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, "Oh sh*t...."

Pedophile

What's the difference between a Catholic priest and a pedophile? There isn't a difference.

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  • Film

    Jeff, did you hear they're making a film about Jimmy Savile? It’s a very touchy subject.

    Yeah, I did, Gary, but did you hear the reviews on the Bill Cosby film? People said it was so boring it put them to sleep.

    Priest

    Roses are red, don’t touch the toys, these are what the priests use to lure in the boys.

    Bill Cosby

    What does Bill Cosby and someone eating at McDonald's have in common?

    They're both mc lovin' what they're eating.

    Side

    Trump's medical records were just released. According to the brain scan, the left side of his brain has nothing right, while the right side has nothing left.

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  • Priest

    What did the choir boy sing to the priest? Nothing, his mouth was full.

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  • Artist

    An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet-Polish friendship, to be called "Lenin in Poland." When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests.

    The painting depicts Lenin's wife naked in bed with Leon Trotsky.

    "But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin?" asks one of the guests.

    "Lenin is in Poland," replies the painter.