Run jokes

What's the difference between a dog and a foster child?

A dog doesn't run to the police after you beat it.

How [does] a disabled kid face [the] Jalalas?

He can't run, just hug the bomb.

One day my pet barked at me and so I got scared and was my dad actually. It was weird, you should’ve saw him and so the day goes on because he likes to run around the house that he likes to do it out 😂😂😂😂😱

So, a blind man got run over by a car... a parked car.

I had to run out of the library because I put the cookbooks in the women's sports section.

Have any of you guys heard the classic airplane jokes? Here's a good example...

A farmer, a doctor, and a terrorist are on a plane. An engine fails, and they are going to crash, so the pilot asks everyone to throw out some items. The farmer threw out his apple harvest, the doctor threw out medical supplies, and the terrorist, (not needing a bomb apparently) threw out his briefcase of bombs. They still crashed, and they started walking to the nearest town. They passed a boy who was running. "Why are you running?"

"My dad got hit by a shiny red object and now he's bleeding!"

They three of them decide it's best to keep quiet, and continue. They then passed a crying girl, who said that her brother had been killed by a scalpel from heaven. They said nothing and continued. Finally, they see a boy laughing so much he is in tears. They ask him, "What's so funny?"

"Grandma farted and the house blew up!"

One day my sister was making hotdogs. My sister asked me if I wanted some. I said no. Then my sister asked my friend, and he always said no.

Then my sister said I have to eat it plain with no flavor. We have no ketchup, mustard, or onions. My friend said I got something to give it flavor. My sister said, "Okay."

My sister left the kitchen to get something. I asked my friend what are you going to do. Then he took the hotdog bread, opened it, and ran his penis all around it, and put some white cream that came out of his penis. I put the hotdogs on the bread. Then my sister came back and put hotdogs on the hotdog bread. I told my sister the hotdogs are ready. She ate them. I asked how were the hotdogs. My sister said, "I don’t know what flavor is this, but it is very tasty."

Why did Michael Jackson run?

Because he lost his glove.

How do you find a redneck virgin?

Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.

If a person in a wheelchair runs you over, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"

My cat got run down. That is a cat-astrophe.

I almost got run over by a car.

For the rest of the day I was taking the backseat as I was wheely tried.

Yo momma is so ugly, Slenderman runs from her.

It's also why he has no eyes.

Why can’t orphans have phones?

Because it has a home button.

Why don’t orphans play baseball?

Because they can’t get a home run.

Why did the knights laugh when they run?

The grass tickled their balls. 😅😂🤣

Me running from the principal because I put ten woman's rights books in the fictional section!

Why is it so easy to roast an orphan?

What are they gonna do, run home and tell their parents?

A B C D E F G.

Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!

So one day a boy was at his dad's work when another little boy ran in crying. Then the dad said, "Aw, little boy, are you lost? Where's your parents?" And the little boy at his dad's work said, "OMG! Dad, you can't say that!"

Why can't he say that?

Answer: He works at an orphanage.

Why did the skeleton run away from the crime scene?

He didn't have the guts to see it.