Sheila, the Aussie housewife, got out of the shower and slipped on the bathroom floor. Instead of falling over forwards or backwards, she did the splits and suctioned cupped herself to the floor. She yelled out for her husband, "Bruce! Bruce!" and he came running in. "Bruce, I’ve bloody suctioned myself to the floor" she said. "S’truth, Sheila!" Bruce said, and tried to pull her up. "You’re stuck fast girl. I’ll go across the road and get me mate Cobber." They came back and they both tried to pull her up from the floor. "No way, we can’t do it!" Cobber said, "So let’s try Plan B" "Plan B?" exclaimed Bruce, "What’s that?" "I’ll go home and get me hammer and chisel and we’ll break the tiles under her" replied Cobber. "Spot on" Bruce said, "While you’re doing that, I’ll stay here and play with her nipples" "Play with her nipples?" Cobber said, "Not exactly a good time for that mate" "No... " Bruce replied, "But I reckon if I can get her wet enough, we can slide her into the kitchen where the tiles are a lot cheaper"
Whats the definition of dissapointment running in to a wall with a bonner but it hits only hits your nose
What do you call a orphan running to home.
He couldn't find home.
why did the blonde run outside naked? she thought the steam was a gas leak
POV: Wine Taster in hell
I was, sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. this silhouette begins to speak, "you have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. how do you plead?" the man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit. "guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like I will take any punishment you deem fit." very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request." out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. the boy says "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." the boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, Taste like chicken."
Is your tap water running well you
Beta go catch it
Me:Why did the bus drop his ice cream? Sanity to live: I don't know? Me:He was run over by Timmy!!! Sanity to live?*dies* Me:*At edge of bridge* wow sweat view Sanity to live:*resurrected* Narrator: sometimes a bridge is all you need... (sponsored by jumping bridges)
FE FI FOUNG BETTER RUN AND HIDE:COVIID (really
I orphan walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand hey bum bum bum got a family
the steven hawkings space telescope will be launched next year, apparently it will have four wheels and run off windows 7
Is your oven running?? Then u better go catch it
If Thomas Running invented running, what did Paul Walker invent?
I hate when people leave their cars running Especially in the summer. I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
What time would it be if Godzilla came to school? Time to run!
What did the chicken say when he saw ahuman running around uncontrollably? "its running around like a human with its head cut off"
Question; Did YOU KNOW, that "Diarrhea" is HEREDITARY? Answer: It "Runs" in YOUR JEANS!
