Run

Run Jokes

Wine

POV: Wine Taster in hell.

I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"

The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.

"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."

"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."

Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."

Diarrhea

Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?

Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!

Mama

Your mama is so fat. She gets winded just thinking about running.

Boy

when the me and the boys got caught walking around the school during recess

Three boys are running through a field. The image text reads: "Me and the boys running from the teacher after telling the African kid to make an infinite water source."

Toe

Touch your toes and hold them. Then spell "run." It will say, "r.u.n."

Telescope

The Stephen Hawking space telescope will be launched next year. Apparently, it will have four wheels and run off Windows 7.

Mama

Yo mama so stupid, she made Patrick run away because he thought it was contagious! 🤣

Orphan

An orphan walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey, bum, bum, bum, got a family?"

Orphan

How to make an orphan's feet bleed? Make them run in place until their parents get them.

Comedian

*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: "You're doing standup tonight, right?" Noob Joker (you): "Yes, I am!" Owner: "Get onto the stage." Me: *walks up stage* Owner: "This is the standup comedian noobpro." Me: "Hey guys, how about some Donald Trump?" Crowd: *RUNS*

Love

My love for you is like poop.

Whenever I feel you, I have to run to the toilet and flush you away.

Donkey

What is a four-legged animal called that can fly?

A donkey flying in the sky running away from me.

Foot

Mommy, mommy, why do I keep running around in circles?

Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!

Olympics

It's the Olympics.

Q) Why did the man decide not to run in his race? A) Because of Olympiad.

Covid

Me running out of the hospital after telling COVID patients to stay "positive."

Ex-wife

On my signal, I would like you to drive onto the pavement (sidewalk) and run over my ex-wife.

Chicken

What did the chicken say when he saw a human running around uncontrollably?

"It's running around like a chicken with its head cut off!"