"Yes, officer! It was a requirement to run over that child. It matched perfectly with the beat drop!"
👱‍♀️ 👱‍♂️what is the difference between two blondes and a Libertarian? A Libertarian hasn't won a presidential election since 1972 and two blondes are too stupid to run in a presidential election
Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME Officer: you ok kid? Me: dont worry! hes my nephew, there was a big spider Officer: oh ok ma'am *walks off* When officer leaves: Me: *gets whip* what did I say about leaving the basement
Why didn't the boy like his christmas presents, hint: they were a soccer, bicycle, and running shoes?
You're so fat when people see you running they can't help but yell out "keep running"
Man 1: Hey I heard you survived a school shooting, what was it like? Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere, I was only able to get a few of them.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, "mommy mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddy's clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started...". The mother cuts him off and says "just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me." Couple hours later the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face shouting "I'm leaving you... Go ahead Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier." Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. "Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle joe last summer."
Gun control in America is perfect the way it is, because the other day my daughter was seeing a boy and i caught them in bed. Then i pulled out my shotgun and nearly shot him. As he was running away I shouted " The only person allowed to f*ck my daughter is me!".
Why are Mexicans so bad in the olympics? Because all the ones that can run, jump, and swim live in America.
i was digging in my back yard and i found gold and i went to run a tell my mom but i realized why i was digging in the back yard
What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill? Taco Bell going out of business
2 simple steps to get 15,000 people to follow you step 1. Buy a bottle of water (doesn't matter the size) step 2 . Run through Africa with that bottle of water. Perfect now You got yourself half the population there following you
A man runs into a church and shouts are there any dawarf nuns in the monsistary,the pope said no causing the man to say to his friend I told you you fucked a penguin
I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked is this train running on time, I said no it runs on steam and coal
Im related to diarrhea it runs in my geans
Why is it you donate one kidney you're a hero but donate four or five and people run and call the police?
people: you're ugly me: ok people: I hate you me: cool IDC people: you're annoying me: good for me people: BTS is dumb me: I'll give you 5 seconds to run
DON'T GO TO GHOSTPOSTER.COM THE PERSON OR PERSONS WHO RUN THAT SITE ARE A FUCKING BUNCH IF DUMB FUCKING CUNTS WHO CAN SUCK MY BIG COCK
Little Sally found out that she had hair on her private area and whent up to her mom and asked "mom I have hair on my privates,what is it?" "OH honey thats your monkey." The mom says So little Sally runs up to her big sister and says "my monkey has hair on it" so the sister replies with a laugh "you think thats cool my monkey is already eating bananas
I painted my black ps5 white so the controller would run faster
