Run jokes

An action hero stops a man running by throwing a tire at him.

What is his one liner? "I told you to stop running or you will get tired."

I saw a Black person riding a bike, so I ran back to my garage. He was still eating.

What is the difference between runners and my car?

My car is still running.

Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

Because they can’t get a home run.

Alcoholics don't run in my family, they drive.

I used to be into fitness. But running from my problems got exhausting.

What time is it when you get home, can you walk walk home, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school?

Hi.

A cat gets its tail run over, and its mother assured him it’ll be okay. “You just have to stay PAW-sitive!”

The mother was later killed in her sleep because her son hates puns. At the funeral, one of her daughters said, “You have CAT to be KITTEN me right MEOW!”

Guess who dies next.

I went home one day and see a few married guys in line in my sister's room. I ask what's going on, my sister is running a contest. The contest is the married guys lick her pussy and guess what she had for breakfast. The winner gets a free blowjob. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder that she thought that she made up that contest.

Stop with the dead baby jokes. We're running out of babies.

Do you know how diarrhea is common in families? Because it runs in your genes.

New skin unlocked: Blood splatter!

(Obtained by running over 69 children.)

In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.

Sound familiar? 🤔

Well, in September 11th...

If a furry looks like an animal, sounds like animal, and acts like an animal, can I run over it with my car like an animal?

Short girl: "How do you see up there?"

Tall guy: "Who said that?"

I spit my drink out and then ran away.

Why are orphans bad at baseball? Because they can't hit home runs.

What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.

Your mama's so fat, she runs a trade deficit with food!

I took a special needs child to a shooting range.

Poor bastard had no idea which direction to run in.

How do we know Cinderella is a virgin?

Because she runs away from balls.