*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: You're doing standup tonight right?* Noob Joker (you): *Yes I am!* Owner: Get onto the stage Me: *walks up stage* Owner: this is the standup comedian noobpro Me: HEY GUYS HOW ABOUT SOME DONALD TRUMP Crowd: *RUNS*
What cannibals call a person that is running? Fast Food
They say during sex you burn offas many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds
I am the ice cream man running over fat kids with my van if you touch my van I’ll smack you in the face with a frying pan if you steal ice cream I’ll shoot you in the face with a fudge machine
A guy runs into a bar, and yells, “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
The bartender says, “Three feet tall.”
The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
*stranger: tries to kidnap a kid* *kid: runs home* A few minutes later the kid was in the back of the van... If you know you know
I was playing a tennis match against a girl and said "I will fuck you up", she said "try me", so that's exactly what I did and I won by forfeit as she ended up running away crying
what do you call a orphan in a wheelchair running into fire? hot wheels
Wy are orphan run around the world after the baseball coach said go home 🏠? Because he didn’t now what the hell to do.
The FitnessGramTM Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
Level 1 Feel it One Two Three Four Five Six Seven; end of level one
why did the orphan cross the road and stop in a lane.to get run over
I was doing a 10km run with my good friend Pessi. As we were setting up our smart watches, The watch voice asked us if we wanted to do solo run or group run. Pessi proceeded to smash both our watches and shout “ I don’t want solo run, I want Penalty” Shame on you pessi😡😡
i would invite you to play baseball but theres no home for you to run to
my kid runs in to day to tell me that he found a floating cow but when he got me to come and see all i saw was a pinata with a tail and white spots such a stuipid child so after that i gave him a nice refeshing drink from the tolit and a few of those choclet sprincles. (: in such a good parent...
Run bestie run!!!!
One day my sister was making hotdogs. My sister ask me if I want some I said no then my sister ask my friend, and he always said no. Then my sister said I have to eat it plain with no flavor we have no ketchup, mustard or onions. My friend said I got something to give it flavor my sister ok. My sister left the kitchen to get something. I ask my friend what are you going to do then he took the hotdog bread open it and run is penis all around, and put some white cream that came out of his penis. I put the hotdogs on the bread then my sister came back My sister came back put hotdogs on the hotdog bread. I told my sister the hotdogs are ready she ate them I ask how was the hotdogs. My sister said I don’t know what flavor is this, but it is very tasty.
What did the policeman shout to the cow running away? Get to the ground beef
Ur momma is so fat, when she chose a yellow shirt when she was on a run, the kids ran after her bc they thought they missed the bus.
quite kid reaches down and class starts running quite kid: whats wrong pulling out my co
Say what you want about Hitler at least he got the trains to run on time
