Roses jokes

Roses are red, violets are blue. If you ever feel alone, I'm always watching you.

Roses are red, Tomatoes are redder. I think we both know, I like you better.

"Why is my name Rose?"

"A rose fell on your head when you were born."

"Why is my name Daisy?"

"A daisy fell on your head when you were born."

"Bedrock is better than Java!"

"Oh, hi Brick!"

Roses are red, violets are black. Why is your chest as flat as your back?

Roses are red, fishers are fishing,

I really hope you’ll be reported missing.

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

God made me pretty, what happened to you?

Roses are red, violets are violets, my dad died in 9/11 and he was a good pilot.

My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day:

Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you're told.

Roses are red, I am very cool, You, on the other hand, Need to drown yourself in a pool.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, God made me pretty, WHAT THE FRICK HAPPENED TO YOU?

Roses are red, violets are blue, I tell you, you look pretty, but all you do is look like a poo.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like your's belongs in a zoo. Don't worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you.

Roses are red and violets are blue, my best friend is Sue, and she's blue, too.

(meaning sad)

Bf: "Roses are red, violets are blue, you're my bf and I luv you."

Gf: "I luv u too."

Bf: "But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, I heard you were cheating, I'll knock off your head."

Gf: "Ah, about that..."

Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

Bf: Babe, do you love me?

Gf: Of course, why do you ask?

Bf: I heard that your mom passed away, and I went to pick some roses for you to try to cheer you up, and then I remembered why I went to the garden.

Jack and Rose went on a cruise to do it in the water.

Jack seldom wore a condom, and now they have a daughter.

Roses are red, I like burgers on a bun.

This news: family neuters furry son.

Roses are red, violets are blue.

YOU HAVE AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE WAITING FOR YOU...

Roses are red. Violets are blue. We're gonna make love because I'm stronger than you.