Retardation jokes
What do you call it when Hitler puts retards in the oven? Baked potatoes.
The retards take the ancestry tests at 24andMe.com.
How did the retard get hurt raking the leaves?
Fell out of the tree.
Why are retards good at basketball?
'Cause they dribble all the time!
Why is flour retarded?
Because it's in-bread.
What’s the hamburgler’s retarded cousin? Aspergler.
What do you call a retarded fruit?
Mentally in-pear-ed.
Retards.
So, a retarded kid's mom drops her kid off at school and says, "You better stop the bus today, because I’m not picking you up." So he agrees, and he arrives at the bus stop and says, "Stop!" (in a retarded voice). The bus goes straight past him. The next day, the mom says the same thing, and the kid goes to the bus stop and says, "Stop!" (in a retarded voice). The bus goes straight past him. The third day, his mom says, "I don’t care if I have to jump out in the middle of the road, you better stop that bus!" So the kid goes to the bus stop and jumps out in the middle of the road and says, "Stop!" The bus driver runs over him. A nearby lady stops the bus and says, "Why’d you run that poor kid over?" and he responds, "'Cause he was making fun of me" (in a retarded voice).
What's the definition of total chaos?
A bus load of retards passing a magnet factory.
When the school shooter says to get on the ground, but the sped kid thinks it's Simon Says!
What do you call a load of retards in a swimming pool?
Vegetable soup.
When her head game is so strong, she sucks the chromosome right out of you.
Me: What do you call a group of retards?
Friend: Down town?
Me: Nope, target practice.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the retard's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
"Mixed vegetables is just special ed class, change my mind."
What's a mentally retarded person's favorite color? Clear.
So I was sitting at a bar, right? That fucking waitress came again, and guess what? She brought the wrong drinks again. So I send her away to get the correct drinks. And she came back again, with the wrong drinks!! Obviously, she was retarded. Anyways that's the story about how I met your mother.
What did the Chinese family name their retarded kid? Something Wong.
I'm fucking retarded.