Restaurant Jokes

What do you call Panera bread when it’s on top of someone?

Panera head.

How does an orange 🍊 go into a crowded restaurant?

By squeezing his way in.

A termite walks into a bar and says, "So, is the bartender here?"

McDonald's sweet chili chicken one.

I got a call from McDonald's; they want their sign back.

What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?

Explosion.

Boy, if you don't get your "I'm Burger King with my Burger Queen!"

One day my friend said: "I want tacos from Katie's, you?" and I said no thanks and she left. I never saw her again. Today I remember that I saw her name on TV as one of the victims of suicide, then I remember her and my motto: "If I'm dying, you're dying with me, you got no choice." I NEVER ate tacos from Katie's again.

What would you like as your last meal?

Fried chicken. Extra crispy.

Taco Bell makes you crappy.

Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.

Hey dude, can you spell IHOP?

Sure, man. I. H. O. P.

Wait, you ate my pee!!!

If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.

I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat.

She said nothing, so I took her to Africa.

In honor of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as other establishments, are introducing the Jackson dog. It's a 50 year old sausage between two 7 year old buns, with everything on it.

What is a cannibal's favorite place to eat?

Five Guys.

This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.

Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.

Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"

Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.

Your hairline goes so far back that Crown Burger was Crown Sandwiches.

Welcome to the roadkill cafe, where yesterday's crash is today's cash.

Welcome to Morgan's Morgue and Pizzeria where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!