Restaurant jokes
I would like to complain about the new sushi restaurant at Gatwick Airport. Although there were large portions going round on the conveyor, they did taste a bit like luggage.
What did the frog order?
A diet Croak!
Why did the chicken go to the restaurant?
To eat chicken!
Why can't orphans go to family restaurants?
Because they don't have a family to go with.
Why can't Tottenham open a restaurant? Because they have no silverware.
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?
He pasta-way.
Just shit my pants and it ran all down my legs... last time I eat at Popeyes.
Yo mama so fat that when the cashier at KFC asked her what size bucket she wants, she said "the one on the roof."
Where do depressed people go to eat?
Suicide Sonic.
I will give you all the fine chicks you want. Just dial this number: 313-974- tap that ass from Hooters strip club.
What did a cannibal have as his last meal?
Five guys.
Sneed feed seed.
Formerly Chuck's!
What do you call two Mexicans at a country restaurant? "Two beaners in a cracker house."
First Date: HE: "I work with animals every day!"
SHE: "Oh how sweet! What is it that you do?"
HE: "I'm a butcher."
SHE: "We're through!"
Why did the pelican get kicked out of the restaurant? Because he had a big bill.
An Autistic chef made hamburgers out of donkey meat.
He called them: "Asperger's."
What's a cannibal's favorite place?
A day care.
I saw a beautiful homeless girl and asked if I could take her out on a date. She politely accepted and enjoyed herself. Soon after, I asked if I could take her home, she smiled and nodded her head. Her smile disappeared when she saw me running away with her cardboard box.
An Indian kid walked into the shop and had a curry down because they had no naan bread in stock.
When a person went to a restaurant, they died once they were in. Three people were a suspect. Two were suspected because she served the food. Turns out, it was the food!