Restaurant

Restaurant jokes

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast any time," so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.

— Steven Wright

If someone calls you, reply with this: “Hi, this is Dave’s orphanage and pizzeria, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I assist you today?”

  • 3
  • Why isn't there a ball pit at Taco Bell? Because it's hard to have fun knowing you might poop your pants.

    I have an account at the website Memedroid.

    My name is J0K35FromWJE.

    Feel free to follow me, and I WILL upload to Memedroid (I might not upload daily).

    I will still make jokes here jlyk (just letting you know).

    Ok here's your joke now...

    What did one pizza say to the other when they were in bed?

    "Can I have a pizza that ass?"

    What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?

    A Topping.

    A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.

    I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...

    Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?

    Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.

    Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!

    Me: You can't kick me out.

    Manager: Why not? Huh?

    Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.

    In a proud, boastful voice, Gemma told the old Chinese woman who was babysitting her that onions were the only food that could make you cry. The woman nodded and said that was true enough.

    They continued eating for a while. "This is really good!" the little girl exclaimed. "What's this meat?"

    The old lady replied with: "Well, there was a brown dog in your yard that wouldn't stop yapping."

    I went to the table to eat my egg, but I couldn't find it anywhere.

    I think someone must've poached it.

    The waiter asked me, "How would you like your steak?"

    I replied, "As soon as possible!"

    What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?

    Kentucky Fried Children!

    What's it called when you eat those same babies?

    Finger Lickin' Good!

    Why can't orphans play at a McDonald's play place? They don't have parent supervision.

    One day, two Chinese people with broken English go to America. When they arrive, they go to a small place to eat. When they look at the menu, they see "hot dog," but since their English is bad, they think it's literally a roasted dog and order it. When it comes back, they're both surprised, and one of them asks,

    "What part of the dog did you get?"