Relatives jokes
What do you call an orphan with no relatives?
An orphan with no relatives.
Q: What do orphans call a family reunion?
A: Me time.
A husband and wife at custody court. The judge looks sternly at the ex-wife.
Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child?"
Ex-wife: "I brought him into this world, so I should have custody of him."
Judge: "That is a simple yet good reason."
Then the judge looks toward the ex-husband.
Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child, sir?"
The ex-husband thought long and hard about his response. After a brief moment of silence, he replies, "If I put money into a Pepsi machine and a Pepsi comes out, is it mine or the machine's?"
When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!” So I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Do trees pee?
How else do we have No. 1 pencils?
My entire family "TAKE THIS GIRL TO AN ASYLUM!!!"
Me "OH NO" 💀
Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
I have no father or no milk. Like if you relate.
Bin Laden's relatives died in a plane crash on 8/1. 🤣🤣🤣
What movie do orphans relate to? Home Alone.
Bin Laden's relatives were killed in a plane crash, lol.
Bin Laden's relatives died in a plane crash on 8/1! #justice
I only have a few friends, like if you relate.
Based on a true story.
I have no father. Like if you relate.
I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike; I just collect body parts.
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
I'm sorry, orphans, that you're getting bullied. Oh, I have to go, my MOM's calling me. We're going on a road trip to go to a FAMILY reunion!
It's funny how you feel so alone with depression, and yet once you tell people on some random website, so many people relate. Unfortunately, it doesn't stop the loneliness.
What movie do orphans relate to the most?
- Home Alone
Your mama so fat she’s on both sides of the family.