Relatives Jokes

My family is like a treasure.

You need a map and shovel to find them.

I hate family reunions.

I see too many of my ex's there.

What do you call an orphan's family reunion? "Me time."

My family is like treasure. You need a shovel and a map to find them.

Sometimes I feel ugly, then I think of my sister and feel better.

The image consists of three panels stacked vertically. The first panel shows a portrait of Isaac Newton, with the text "I don't think you understand the gravity of this situation." The second panel shows a portrait of Albert Einstein with the text "I believe I'm relatively aware of it." The third panel shows a portrait of Charles Darwin, with the text "Guys! Don't let this evolve into a huge argument."

Some people think incest jokes are funny.

I just think it's all relative.

The last thing I told my ex after we broke up was, "At least we're still cousins!" 😂

Closer kin, deeper in!

Looks like the gene pool in your family is about three inches deep.

Why are Alabamians so resentful of immigrants?

They don't want their sons and daughters to have sex with anyone other than their siblings or relatives.

Why was the ant so confused?

All of its uncles were ants.

What's the difference between flat earthers and my grandfather? Flat earthers are more disconnected from reality than my grandfather is disconnected from his life support.

I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike; I just collect body parts.

Incest. A game the whole family can play.

When your friend asks why you don't smile, then you look at them and realize no one is there because you have no friends. #my life

Cousins make dozens.

Your family tree looks like a circle 💀💀💀

I will always remember my grandfather's last words: "I'll just check if it's poisonous."

It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. “No,” says the neighbor. “The seat is empty.” “This is incredible,” said the man. “Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?” The neighbor says, “Well, actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.” “Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible... But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?” The man shakes his head. “No,” he says. “They’re all at the funeral.”