Recreation jokes

What do you call a load of retards in a swimming pool?

Vegetable soup.

What do you call a guy that's high in a wheelchair?

A baked potato.

What do emo kids like to do in their spare time?

Hanging out.

A guy goes ice fishing for the very first time. All of a sudden, he hears a voice. “There are no fish under the ice!”

He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. Again, he hears the booming voice: “There are no fish under the ice!”

He nervously looks up and asks, “Lord? Is that you?”

“No, this is the rink manager!”

How do you make a handkerchief dance?

You put a little boogie in it.

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

Because they don’t have a home to run to.

If you jump off a building and yell "parkour," how can they tell that it was intentional? T'was a failed stunt.

I make weed disappear, what's your superpower?

Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide!

I asked my dad why a grown man would play Pokémon Go?

He said “Wynaut.”

Why couldn’t the kid play baseball? Because he couldn’t find home.

Why did the golfer change his pants?

Because he got a hole in one!

What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

They don’t know where home is.

What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back?

A stick.

Why couldn't an orphan play baseball?

He couldn't find home plate.

I bought my son a trampoline. That little a**hole stayed in his wheelchair the whole day.

Did you hear about the guy that went to a nudist colony? The first day was his hardest.

🎨🧑🏻‍🦰 day was that good fun day at home 🏠. I had to the earth and I love it when you get a home and walk walk home from school and walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home 🏠. Was your birthday 🎁? I did.

I recently got kicked out of a casino because I apparently misunderstood what the craps table was for.