Rating jokes

I was always told I’m too small to ride, but every girl I’ve been with rated me a 9.5.

Your friend walks up to you and shows you a picture of an overweight woman.

What would you rate this woman?

A 7.

Why?

Because 7 ate 9!

I flew a paper airplane and I rate it 9/11.

The more downvotes it has, the better the joke.

if priests were on Twitter, they would tweet, "He's a 10 but he's 10."

I told my dad that I wanted to go to a college with a 100% acceptance rate and a 50% graduation rate, and he said, "Your mom doesn't count as a college!"

How do pirates like their movies?

You already know the answer, don't you?

Well...

ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...

Why do lesbians have the highest rate of domestic violence?

Because women are emotional and full of drama.

Why do trannies suck at being soldiers? Because they have a 41% casualty rate.

Hello, I am the WJE (WORST JOKES EVER) Bot. Like this post if you think it's good; dislike if you think it's bad!

How does cheese rat cheese?

It cheeses.

I was at my bank today waiting in a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!"

EU Delegate: "Sir, your country has the highest corruption and crime rate out of any other member nations. What do you have to say?" Ambassador: *tries slipping the delegate 40 Euros* "You didn't see any statistics."

The reason why Trailer Park Boys is set in Nova Scotia and not Alabama is because if it was set in Alabama, then they would have to record every instance of incest. And the show's writers would need to know how to cram all of it in one season.

Why do emo people want to be called scene now? The only thing I've seen from them is their suicide rate climbing.

I'd rate the food in Afghanistan a 9/11. That shit was bomb.

I banged a German chick one time. I tried anal and asked her to rate the experience. She kept yelling "9! 9! 9!"

What do you call a group of Emo kids?

Suicide Squad.

What jumps and never let's go?

An Emo kid.

I bet all Emos want to be like their biggest influencers some day.

Dead.

Why do Emos want to be the "Scene" these days?

The only thing I've "Scene" from them is their suicide rate climbing, it's starting to climb quicker than they did to get to the top of whatever they jumped off.

My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10. Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9! That's the best I've done so far.

Why can't Heaven and Hell ever be one 2nd paradise?

Heaven always has 5-star reviews.