Put jokes
How do you blindfold a woman?
Put a windshield in front of them.
Why are Mexican families so big?
They don’t know how to put a condom on.
Crazy? I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once...
How do you get a party started in Africa?
You put a slice of bread on the ceiling and everyone will be jumping.
My phone is just like the Twin Towers; they got put in airplane mode.
I had to run out of the library because I put the cookbooks in the women's sports section.
What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler?
“Oh my god, put them back in the damn ovens! They’re so under-cooked they’re writing fucking diaries!”
Your mama is so stupid, she put a ruler under her pillow to measure how long she slept.
Yo mama so stupid, she put airbags on her computer in case it crashed.
How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket!
Are you sure your father isn't a thief?
Because he stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
This isn’t much of a joke, but here's a pickup line. Are you a marshmallow? Because I wanna put my stick in you.
What happens when you have dry elbows at work?
You don't have any elbow grease to put into it.
"How does dry skin affect you at work?""You don’t have any elbow grease to put into it."
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
A bowling ball doesn't cry when you put your fingers in it.
How do you blind an Asian?
Put a windshield in front of them.
New business idea: let's put a KFC in Africa and a watermelon shop.
How are Kentucky Fried Chicken and a woman the same?
Once you take away the legs and the breasts, you’re left with one greasy box to put your bone in.
Put Helen Keller in George Floyd's position. How would she cry out for help? Would she just moan, or would she try to do sign language?
Once I read a book about glue.
I couldn't put it down.