What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature -- Tequila Mockingbird
Why are cats bad storytellers? -- Because they only have one tale.
My friend; you lit my mind: that's what the lighter said to my thighs
I am about to make a joke about cake. You butter believe it
What's a similarity Cliff Hanger and Nooses?
They both leave you Hanging
What did the suicidal leperchaun say Irish i was dead
I don't like these Under tale jokes. They just don't make any Sans.
The guy who made the knock knock joke deserves a no bell prize.
My friends used to poke me at weddings and say "You're next". So I started poking them at funerals and saying "You're next" to my friends.
I'm not lazy, I'm just bone tired. I bet that one tickled your funny bone. It sure got me rattled. Don't try to stop me. I've got a skele-ton of these!
What do you call a cow with a twitch? -- Beef jerky.
Person 1: stop making suicidal jokes!? Person 2: okay okay, I’ll cut it out. Person 1: really? Person 2: their not even that deep.
My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."
Sans: wow. seems you’re really working yourself... down to the bone!
Duck walks Into a bar the duck says to the bartender hey bartender got any bread bartender says no then the duck says hey bartender got any bread bartender says NO duck says hey bartender got any bread bartender says no and if you say that one more time I will nail your bill to this bar duck says hey bartender got any nails bartender says no the duck says well then bartender got any bread
You know, most people take rocks for granite... sorry
I told my sister a Dairy joke,
She said it was cheesy.
What do you call an elf that sings: A Wrapper
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft, and I’ll show you A-flat minor
How do you think the unthinkable? With an ithberg.
