Alcohol

What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? -- Tequila Mockingbird.

Cat

Why are cats bad storytellers? Because they only have one tail.

  • 1
  • Guy

    The guy who made the knock knock joke deserves a no-bell prize.

  • 2
  • Egg

    Why doesn't my egg want to crack?

    Because I hate my egg-sistence.

  • 4
  • Funeral

    My friends used to poke me at weddings and say, "You're next."

    So I started poking them at funerals and saying, "You're next" to my friends.

  • 4
  • Skeleton

    I'm not lazy, I'm just bone tired. I bet that one tickled your funny bone. It sure got me rattled. Don't try to stop me. I've got a skele-ton of these!

  • 7
  • Girlfriend

    My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."

    Suicide

    Person 1: Stop making suicidal jokes!

    Person 2: Okay, okay, I’ll cut it out.

    Person 1: Really?

    Person 2: They're not even that deep.