Puns
Who’s the roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table?
Circumference.
Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
What did the flag say to the pole?
Nothing, he just waved.
I know it sounds cheesy, but I feel grate!
What did the window say to the door?
"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"
Get it?
Apple tried to make a car, but it had no windows ;)
What did the beaver say to his son?
Dam, son.
Q. What do you call a goose that thinks he's a goat?
A. A Billy Goose.
G@y 👌
Roses are red, But grass is greener, When I think of you, I play with my wiener.
What do you call a dead parrot?
Polygon.
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
Robin: "The car's not working."
Batman: "Did you check the battery?"
Robin: "What's a tery?"
Why didn't anyone care about the circus?
Because it was irr-elephant.
I tried writing with a dull pencil the other day, but there was no point.
Why don't dinosaurs lay eggs?
Because they're EGGstinct!
Q: What did one koala say to the other? A: How's it hanging? 😂
How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card.
Person: I broke my arm in three places.
Doctor: Well, don't go to those three places then.