New Punchline Jokes - Page 12

I ran into a dwarf and he said: "Well, I’m not Happy."

Then which one are you?

I'm funny but sad, I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.

What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding, he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.

What did the math book say to the other math book?

Wanna hear my problems?

What is a vampire's favourite animal? A giraffe.

What is a vampire's favourite fruit? Neck-tarines.

Those two jokes are not funny at all!

i told my friend an egg joke yesterday he thought it was eggcelent.

A man goes into heaven and there he meets jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says "that is mother teresa's clock it has never moved because she has never lied". "There is Abraham Lincolns clock. He has .lied twice so it has moved twice." "Where is Donald Trump's?" Ask's the man. Jesus answers "it is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."

None of these jokes really took off

I would tell a joke about my abusive dad but I can only think of the punchline.

I have a really good construction joke but I’ll have to post it later because I’m still working on it

My friend told me an emo joke once and I said ̈emo jokes aren ́t funny, cut it out ̈

So there was 3 baby chickens and 2 mothers the first baby said "why am I named calf?" and the mother said "I f###ed a cow" then the second baby came up to it's mother and it said " why am I named b##ch? " and it's mom said "I f###ed a wolf and the final baby came to its mother and said "why am I named orphan?" And because it's mother wasn't there to see it this is what I have to say "because you are one you ducking hitch!!"

Q. What do you call a bear with no teeth...

A. A gummy bear

Knock knock, who's their? Europe, Europe who? No i'm not

10 years ago my dad went to get milk he said when he got back he was going to tell me a joke. that joke better be worth it

Three men are shipwrecked on a jungle island and taken prisoner by the residing cannibals, they are all told to walk into the jungle and come back with one piece of fruit, they go in and the first man comes out with a peach, he is instructed to shove it in his ass and if he laughs he will be killed, he tries and dies, the second man comes back with a grape and is instructed to do the same, when the two meet at the pearly gates the first man says, i had a peach, there fuzzy, you had a grape whats your excuse? "Well i was doing fine until I say jimmy come out of the brush with a pineapple.

I'd make a joke about corn, but its to corny. Then again, i could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. my funny bone is broken, i guess it was because those jokes where to HUMERUS.