Problem jokes
What do you tell a suicidal person when they complain about their problems to you?
Just hang in there, man.
A man goes to a doctor and says he's having problems shitting, so the doctor gives him an enema and says he needs to do it a few times at home, but does the first one for him. So the guy bends over the table, lubes him up, and shoves it deep in him, and he yells.
So later, the man goes home and tells his wife he needs her help with the enema. So he bends over, she lubes him up, puts a hand on his shoulder, and she shoves it up there, and he starts screaming and cussing, and the wife asks, "Did I hurt you?" He said, "No, I just realized when the doctor did it, he had both hands on my shoulders."
Why do dwarfs hate fast food restaurants? Cause most of them have medium and large.
Why did the orphan not get service at the restaurant?
Because it was a family restaurant!
What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.
Name something an orphan can't do?
Go cry to their mommy.
The emo was having computer problems because they had troubleshooting.
Feed the hungry with the hungry. It solves world hunger and overpopulation at once!
In America, you work on a plantation.
In Soviet Russia, the plantation works on you!
So imagine bullying an orphan so bad they cry, and then you say, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
Why do orphans hate baseball so much?
Because they can't run home.
Zion is so fat that his dick can't even fit in his wife's pussy.
Zion's so fat, when he walks, he breaks his mama's back.
Why can't orphans ever get a car? Because they don't have a birth certificate.
Orphans must hate 2020 because you need a home to homeschool.
Yo mama so fat when she step on a scale it say, "To be continued..."
Why was Liverpool the worst bespoke? Rio supports it, hahah!
An orphan girl wanted a family so she was raped until pregnant. Problem solved.
Why did Stephan Hawking not turn up to the meeting?
His internet connection ran out.
Emo: Phone die.
Emo: Why not me? ;(