Politics jokes
What's Osama Bin Laden's favorite drink?
A double Manhattan.
Why can North Korea draw a straight line? Because they've got a supreme ruler.
What do you get when you cross a dick and a potato?
A dictator.
What do you call a cemetery of dead Arabs? A mine field.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a suicidal vest?
A suicidal vest actually works when triggered.
Who will win the war: like for Russia, dislike for Ukraine?
American people: We will throw your teabags in the ocean!
British: At least our towers didn’t fall. 😎
The moment when you tell an illegal immigrant to go home and he walks to the jail cell and closes it.
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
If you go to someone's house and see the flag of the former Soviet Union hanging on the wall,
that's a big red flag!
Trump pumped and dumped his wife at the border.
The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters, ... so Trump can't tweet it.
Do you know why no one speaks about George Washington?
John Adams turned him into atoms. John Adams was an alien.
"Whole November month, sniper lessons available in Dallas U.S.?"
What is the difference between a male prostitute who is a Democrat and a male prostitute who is a Republican?
When Republicans perform fellatio for money, it is called prostitution, but when Democrats perform fellatio for money, it is called a donation to their political campaign.
What do pretzels and a corrupt government have in common?
They are both twisted.
I went to kill Biden with poison water and mixed it with my finger, and then licked it. I passed out, and now I'm here.
What do you call a woman in a fighter jet to the right of the president?
An escort.
What do ICE and Mexican drug cartels both have in common?
They both kidnap Canadian women!
Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:
Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"