Why is it you donate one kidney you're a hero but donate four or five and people run and call the police?
i called the suicide hotline and he suggested i drew on myself to distract myself. i replied id get ink poisoning
wouldnt recommend the police came
I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say, “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty.”
That’s when Penaldo asked, “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.
Shame on you Penaldo!
Why is Steven Hawkins arrested? The police used computer GPS
Bf :- babe are you traffic police? Gf :- No Bf :- then why do you shout at me not wearing the helmet ?
What hates socialism but still uses roads, police and says they support the military? Dumb right wingers
I got arrested because I cremated a guy. They said the guy had been alive when I burned him. I mean, it's an early cremation—what's the difference?
I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.
what did the woman do when the armed police officer raped her?
freeze
Why did the orphan become a killer? Because he knew they would not look for him
What do you call a Pokémon that wants to be a police officer? Magic-cop!
one day a couple was walking when the man stepped on something hard and squishy then they heard a sound from the bushes, instead of looking down they both ran.
two years later they turned on the TV to find Ted Bundy on trial they asked him if he has ever been caught he said "No but a couple was walking as soon as i killed a girl i jumped into a bush they didnt know i was there but the man stepped on the dead body but didn't look down then he and his girlfriend ran."
I wish I was a police man cause then I would actually have a gun to shoot myself with
i really wasnt planning on going for a run today, but damn those cops came put of nowhere’s
A woman has been raped by a man, she calls the police and a policeman shows up - Woman: Please help officer I have been raped! Officer: No problem ma'am, I will just unrape you Woman: Whhat? Unrape me? How?
Officer proceeds to bring back the rapist and forces the woman to rape the rapist back in order to cancel out the initial rape
"You are under arrest for illegally downloading the entire Wikipedia."
"Wait! I can explain everything."
Why do orphans wanna be a criminal?
So that they can be wanted.
a man walks into a bar he see's a family court judge, his wife, her lawyer, and a police officer, he gets on his hands and knees and prays to god out loud, the bar tender says, why are you praying? He says, because I just saw the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse, and the bible tells me when I see them the end is at hand.
What's the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan?
Only one is wanted.
Today is sad my sister got hit by a car and I lost my license as a driver
