Pleasing jokes
A Roman guy walks into a bar, holds up two fingers and says, "Can I have 5 beers please?"
I called my mom on Alexa, and she told me, "Please take out the trash." I said, "But I can't, you're not here."
I am sorry, but I need some text to work with. Please provide the text from the comments section so I can generate the JSON data for you.
Technoblade!
Please tell me you understand this...
How emos propose: Would you please join my family tree?
let me see it
Hello, I am Alan Shawn Feinstein. I would like to know who the owner of this website "worstjokesever.com" is.
I am interested in buying this website. Please respond to me in the comments or email me. Thank you, and keep doing good things.
Astronaut In The Ocean-By- Masked Wolf and watersharky Music Productions-
Astro-naut
What you know about rollin' down in the deep?
When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze
When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah
I feel like an astronaut in the ocean, ayy
What you know about rollin' down in the deep?
When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze
When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah
I feel like an astronaut in the ocean
She say that I'm cool (damn straight)
I'm like "yeah, that's true" (that's true)
I believe in G-O-D (ayy)
Don't believe in T-H-O-T
She keep playing me dumb (play me)
I'ma play her for fun (uh-huh)
Y'all don't really know my mental
Lemme give you the picture like stencil
Falling out, in a drought
No flow, rain wasn't pouring down (pouring down)
See, that pain was all around
See, my mode was kinda lounged
Didn't know which-which way to turn
Flow was cool but I still felt burnt
Energy up, you can feel my surge
I'ma kill everything like this purge (ayy)
Let's just get this straight for a second, I'ma work
Even if I don't get paid for progression, I'ma get it (get it)
Everything that I do is electric
I'ma keep it in a motion, keep it moving like kinetic, ayy (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
Put this shit in a frame, better know I don't blame
Everything that I say, man I seen you deflate
Let me elevate, this ain't a prank
Have you walkin' on a plank, la-la-la-la-la, like
Both hands together, God, let me pray (now let me pray)
Uh, I've been going right, right around, call that relay (Masked Wolf)
Pass the baton, back and I'm on
Swimming in the pool, Kendrick Lamar, uh
Want a piece of this, a piece of mine, my peace a sign
Can you please read between the lines?
My rhyme's inclined to break your spine
They say that I'm so fine
You could never match my grind
Please do not, not waste my time
What you know about rollin' down in the deep?
When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze
When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah
I feel like an astronaut in the ocean, ayy
What you know about rollin' down in the deep?
When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze
When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah
I feel like an astronaut in the ocean.
Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.
Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.
Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.
Amber: Fine!!!!!
Who wants to be my boyfriend, please?
How to get 60 Translink workers? Please head out of the pool because ya'll are fat. Oh wait, didn't you poop yourself? Say sorry to your underwear while pooping as a fat Canadian Translink worker, little boy.
Ur dad is gay!
Omg! I didn't mean that. Please don't tell ur mom.
I'm so so so sry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Lionel: Leona, please no more singing your annoying Fuzzy Bear song!
Leona: But I love my song, right Fuzzy?
Fuzzy Bear: I am going to bite you for not letting your sister sing my song!
*Fuzzy Bear bites Lionel*
Lionel: AHHHHHHH
The joke is missing. Please provide the joke text.
If my boobies are fish, then am I salmon boobies? Please give generously.
Give this post the most likes, please?
The pastor of the local church calls on the congregation for volunteers for Bible sales.
A gentleman with a severe stutter approaches the pastor after Sunday service.
"I-i-i... I-i-id like to v-v-v-v-vol-vol-vo-volunteer to s-s-s-se-sell b-b-b-bi-b-bibles, f-fff-f-f-fa-fa-father..."
"That would be wonderful, my son. We'll start you with one box. Please go door to door throughout the community and sell what you can. You can give these away, but donations are always accepted since the word of God is the most important message."
"T-t-t-t-th-th-th-thank you f-ff-f-f-f-fa-fa-fath-father... i-i-i-i-i-i-I'll s-s-s-s-se-se-sell what I c-c-c-cc-can..."
The pastor sends the man on his way.
About an hour later to the pastor's surprise, the stuttering man returns with an empty box and $200 cash.
The pastor is completely shocked, but is ultimately filled with joy as the church could use the funds more than ever, not to mention the community is that much closer to God's message.
So without asking questions, he happily sends the stuttering man on his way with 2 more boxes of Bibles.
"T-t-t-t-t-t-th-th-th-th-tha-thank you f-ff-f-f-f-fa-fa-fath-father, i-i-i-i-i-i-I'll be back s-s-s-s-s-soo-soo-soo-soon."
Exactly 2 hours later the stuttering man returns, only this time carrying 2 empty boxes and $500 cash.
The pastor is at a loss for words. So much so, that he's questioning whether the stuttering man is coming across these funds legitimately.
He pulls the man aside and asks, "Son, while myself and the church thank you for your efforts in selling these bibles, we want to make sure not to take advantage of common people. Most of my volunteers take upwards of a month to sell a single box of Bibles, and you've sold 3 boxes in a few hours. May I ask what you're telling these people when you approach their home?"
"W-w-w-w-we-we-well f-ff-f-f-f-fa-fa-fath-father it-it-it-it-its qui-q-q-q-qui-quite s-s-s-s-s-s-si-sim-simple."
"I ju-ju-ju-ju-just ask the-the-th-th-th-the-them if th-th-th-th-the-the-they'd l-l-l-l-li-li-li-li-lik-like to b-b-b-b-b-b-b-bu-bu-buy a b-b-b-bi-bi-bi-bible or if they w-w-w-w-w-wa-wa-wa-wan-want me to re-re-re-rea-read it to them."
Not a joke, but this needs saying. Please can someone do something about all the pedo posts on here. It’s honestly just nasty.
I'll never forget my aunt's last words before she died: "Can you stop shaking the ladder, please?"
"FUCK IT HURTS SO BAD PLEASE SEND AN AMBULANCE I CAN'T BREATHE (I am Paul Walker btw)"
I f*** my dad. Please help me. 😭😭😭😭