Play jokes
A family of 3, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie? It’ll be fun.”
“Ok,” the mom and son reply happily.
“Let me start,” says the son.
“Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom.
“I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son.
“Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games,” says the mom.
“Your right!” He replies.
“I’ll go next,” says the dad. “I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.”
“Hmm... Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom,” Says the son.
“The lie is the second on,” says the dad.
What do you call a dick playing badminton?
A shuttlecock.
How do you know the baby's dead? The dog plays with it more.
What are Africans' favorite game to play? Hungry hippos.
Life is like a game of chess.
I don’t know how to play chess.
Memes
What do orphans do after they win a game?
Nothing, they have no one to play games with.
Name one person who would take an orphan?
Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Playing a game called 7-Up.
Student: Why can't I use a pencil to tap their fingers?
Teacher: It's cheating!
Student: No! It's the object of the game.
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."
Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."
So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.
Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"
The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
Why is pounding your mom like playing video games?
Because once you start, you just can’t stop until you win!
My neighbor's daughter gave me a three-course meal last night:
Starters - role play and stripping.
Main course - Reverse Cowgirl.
Dessert - Blowy.
Once my cat was playing video games. I was OVERWATCHing him.
I asked him to PAWS the game. He then hissed at me. I was surprised; he usually has a good PURRsonality. He said he YARNED to play the game.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because he doesn’t know where home is.
My friend: Hey, I got 15 kills!
Me: I got 60 kills!
My friend: I didn't know you played Call of Duty!
Me: What's Call of Duty?
I played Clash of Clans, and when I requested troops, all I got were some Muslim wall breakers.
Why do orphans hate hide and seek?
Their parents went to play hide and seek years ago.
Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!
What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.