Place jokes

I know this place may be cruel, but hang in there!

Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says, "what's the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks?" The man says, "it's not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place."

A man had moved to a new country with his dog and with basic understanding of the language. One day he heard people talking about a place for dogs, so he took his dog there, telling them he wanted his dog to be groomed.

The man behind the counter responded with "yes happy dog, come back in little hours." So the man left and came back a couple hours later. When he asked about his dog, he was given a box of jerky. He found out "Happy Dog" was the name of the place where dogs become food.

There was a little boy named Chris who was addicted to Roblox.

One day, his grandpa fell into a deep coma caused by a head injury.

One day, little Chris went to visit his poor grandpa. He brought his Windows 10 too, but it had no charge in it. After pulling out some wires and placing his into the wall, he started to hear a long beeping sound, but ignored it and continued to play Roblox. Chris's parents came and saw what had happened.

The dad then yelled, "You dumb f***, you killed my father!!!"

Then Chris said "Yeah. He was worth robucks, too."

Imagine working at the World Trade Center, only for Osama bin Laden to call and ask if he could crash at your place.

Blue: The ocean is a place where the creatures live.

Black: NIGHTMARES LIVE!

Blue: It has many pretty things and it will-

Black: KILL YA TO DEATH! Especially if you are on Titanic! So let that sink in. PUN INTENDED!

Aj died in a bar.

The end.

What do a convention of nerds and Kurt Cobain's garage have in common?

There's brains all over the place.

What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!

What did the south tower say to the north tower? It said: nothing.

9/11 joke.

What's a pedophile's favorite place to go in?

Kum and Go.

Where's a cannibal's favorite place to eat?

Chili's, because they got them baby back ribs.

What's the best part of dating a homeless girl? You can drop her off anywhere.

Yeah, Asians have squinty eyes, but that's because they have had the displeasure of seeing so many ugly obese Americans in one place.

My mom told me it's not healthy to stay in my room all day... but the only places I'm allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.

What do you call the place where an octopus is sitting? Octopied.

Women should be allowed to leave the kitchen... to clean the rest of the house.