Pizza jokes
This guy walked into a pizzeria and ordered a water. The owner called him an idiot.
His girlfriend walked in and ordered a pineapple pizza.
The guy left her, and the owner made her leave.
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today?”
Person 2: “Seven.”
Person 1: “What the fuck, dude.”
Person 2: “I know, right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.”
(Based on an encounter I had recently)
What’s the Twin Towers' favorite kind of pizza?
A: Plain.
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
They are like pepperoni and cheese as a plane.
Why were the World Trade Center so mad? Because they ordered 3 pizzas, but 2 came in plane and 1 went to the wrong address.
Q: What's the difference between a folk singer and a 14" pizza?
A: The pizza can support a family of four.
I traded my sister for a slice of pizza. Damn, that pizza was good!
Someone went to fly and thought of pizza.
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.
Next time you get a call from anybody, say, "Hi, welcome to Dave's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"
Or,
"Hi, welcome to Pizza and Abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce!"
What's the difference between a dead baby and a slice of pizza?
A dead baby can't feed a family.
You work at Papa's Pizzeria, ok?
Boss: You're fired!
Me: Ok?
Worker: Why are you fired?
Me: Oh, you wanna know...
*shows him the oven with my pizza*
Me: I left my pizza in the oven, that bitch burnt as fuck!!
Worker: OH SHIT!!
Boss: Did you say pizza?
Me: I sure did!
*shows boss pizza in oven*
Me: This hoe black as fuck!
Boss: I fired you because I can't stop looking at your ass, not this why?
What's the difference between putting a baby and a pizza in an oven?
The pizza doesn't scream in the oven.
Why is the Pentagon mad?
Because it didn't get two pizzas, but only one plane pizza.
What was the last pizza order at the World Trade Center?
Two large planes.
Why were the Twin Towers mad during 9/11?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead got plane.
What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?
"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."
I would tell you a joke about pizza,
but it's too cheesy.
You want a pizza from me!!!!
Why was 911 annoyed at the pizza guy?
Because they ordered meat lovers, but they got plane.