Physics jokes
Stephen Hawking isn't really dead, he's just rebooting.
Guess Stephen's batteries died.
He's dead now.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He had a computer virus!
Don't trust the atoms, because they make up everything.
Q. Why is Stephen Hawking so good at air guitar?
A. Because he has excellent string theory.
A guy is at home and he's about to go get a physical at the doctor's office. When he gets there, the doctor says, "Brian, you're going to have to stop masturbating." He asked the doc why? The doc said, "So I can examine you!"
Why did the man fall off his bike?
Because someone threw a refrigerator at him.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking in a house fire.
When Stephen Hawking was asked why he was instantly attracted to his new girlfriend, he said, "It's simple, she pushes all the right buttons."
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course it can, a house can't jump.
Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? Because he can't do stand-up.
How do you stay warm in a cold room?
You go to the corners. It's always 90 degrees.
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with a bull? They both charge.
Atoms are untrustworthy little critters. They make everything up!
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house? No, he hasn't either.
I would tell you a science joke, but I know I won't get a reaction.
How to make time fly?
Answer: Throw a clock out of the window.
Why is Stephen Hawking going to hell? Because it's a stairway to heaven, not a ramp!
Did you ever walk into Steve Hawking's house?
"No."
He hasn't too.