When a military person dies, we shoot all night. When a drunkard dies, we drink all night. When a Christian dies, we pray all night. What if a prostitute dies? What should we do? Please tell me.
Homeless person says to a rich person, "I'm homeless."
Rich person: "Then buy a house!"
You know, being a bitch is hard... but I found the person who's up for the challenge... you.
What do my clothes and a depressed person not have in common?
My clothes don't hang themselves...
What's the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person?
They both hang...
What did one cheese say to the other cheese?
"Hello, it's a nice day, do you have any plans on what you're going to do?"... The other cheese was taken back by his politeness and friendliness, they agreed to meet again, and were soon married and lived happily ever after. Let this tale of the two cheeses inspire you to be a better person.
When a person went to a restaurant, they died once they were in. Three people were a suspect. Two were suspected because she served the food. Turns out, it was the food!
Person one: Why did the boy go home?
Person two: Why?
Person one: Because he had PHOAM work to do!
What would fall out of a tree first, a depressed person or a feather?
Answer: The feather wouldn't. The rope would stop the person from falling all the way.
What does the depressed person say to the happy person?
"Damn, I wish I was on the stuff you're on, lol."
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal?
LIFE.
Friend: If you could get rid of any one person in your life, who would it be?
Me: Me.
Friend: *does nothing*
(x_x)
I forgot that I don't have friends.
This is the true worst joke ever:
What did the person say to the other guy when he met him?
Hi!
Person one: What did the DJ name his son?
Person two: IDK, what?
Person one: Erik (while making a DJ motion).
One day, two friends found a treasure map. So they decided to try to find the treasure.
After several hours they found the treasure. It was a suit that gives the person wearing it super strength. One of the friends wore the suit and hugged the other friend. They were both red.
Me sees crazy man hit a old poor person. Me dials 911.
Police: What is that location?
Me: I don't know where is dis location.
Police: Mission failed, we will try again later.
Me: WTH?
Police: Ends call.
Me: Calls hospital.
Hospital: What is that location?
Me: I don't know where is dis location.
Hospital: Mission failed, we will try again later.
Me: WTH IS HAPPENDS EVERY TIME NOW EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE.
Hospital: Hangs up.
Me: Calls fire dEpArTmEnT.
Fire: No fire.
Fire dEpArTmEnT: What is that location?
Me: Hangs up and give up and goes home.
A person laughs every day.
"Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!"
A "type person" is addicted to eating sugar.
When the doctor saw this, he said,
"From Type 2 Diabetes!"
Get it?
What do you call a person who wants to be punched a lot?
A clout chaser.
Search up "clout meaning" if you don't get it.
What is the difference between shroud and a shroud imposter?
Shroud uses reddit, and the imposter uses WJE.
Reddit king and q, I really dgaf what you say, you guys are practically obsessed with me cuz ur leaving hate comments on almost all my jokes, so stop. You're obviously gonna look bad if you just insult meh jokes.
If you guys dont like my jokes, you can just dislike and not leave a comment, ok?
