Person jokes
I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs.
Gravity sure is fast.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?
Impossible!
Me: Knock knock.
Person: Who's there?
Me: No-one.
Person: No-one who?
Me:...........
Q: What kind of person has 100% ambition and never gives up if someone gets in their way?
A: A rapist.
Person 1: Stop making suicidal jokes!
Person 2: Okay, okay, I’ll cut it out.
Person 1: Really?
Person 2: They're not even that deep.
Honestly
What’s one thing that a gay person is scared of?
A gay guy that’s straight!
Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?
My friend: Chunky dunks.
Me: Do you take milk before cereal, or cereal before milk?
The adult person I asked: Cereal?
Me: I take the bowl first! What do you do? Do you just pour everything on the table and then eat it?
The person: Yes.
Me: WHAT?!!!??!!
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A saltshaker.
Talk to me if you're online.
I gave a homeless person a phone but did not give him a home button.
Why did the emo person cross the road?
TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE Haha.
What's the one thing that makes a depressed person jump? A bridge.
A foreign man came to America not knowing a word of English and right away began looking for a job. He became a chorus teacher and learned to say, "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" After that he joined the Army and learned to say, "Yes sir!" After that he worked at a restaurant and learned to say, "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" After that he worked at a candy store and picked up the words, "Goody-goody gumdrops!"
A few weeks later, there was a murder in the area and he was the first person to be interrogated by the police. The interrogation went as follows:
Policeman: "Who killed the man?" Foreign man: "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" Policeman: "Did you kill the man?" Foreign man: "Yes sir!" Policeman: "What did you use to kill him?" Foreign man: "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" Policeman: "You're under arrest." Foreign man: "Goody-goody gumdrops!"
If you're a cat person, never let hungry Chinese into your house. They might just have a snack.
Since Christopher Reeves can't play Superman, they got a new person: Christopher Walken.
LEGO Ninjago - I like it, okay?
Which of the ninja would be best for an undercover mission as the person in disguise?
Kai. He just has to leave his hair down and no one would know it was him. He uses hair gel, as Cole has said a couple times I think, because his hair looks like fire 🔥!
Why do Chinese people need glasses to see better?
All they need to do is open their eyes.
Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes! Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?