Person jokes
How do you punish a blind person?
Hand them a gun and tell them it’s a hairdryer.
Why can’t you have a proper conversation with a gay person?
They’re never straight with you.
Who is not hungry in Africa?
A dead person.
One time a blind person grabbed my arm thinking it was something else.
"Oh wow, this is such an interesting book!"
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today?”
Person 2: “Seven.”
Person 1: “What the fuck, dude.”
Person 2: “I know, right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.”
(Based on an encounter I had recently)
Memes
How do you know when a fat person stops eating? You read about it in the obituary.
What's a suicidal person's favorite type of bath bomb?
A toaster.
Hey, I just want to give a round of applause to Shooter McFly, single-handedly keeping the jokes section alive. Unappreciated, well, Shooter, one person here appreciates you, at least.
When you're born on 4/20/69...
Why did I trip over your foot?
Because you were so short I couldn’t see you!
What do you call a transgender person in a wheelchair?
An Autobot.
What can’t a person with no arms do: if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
What are the similarities between a blind person and an orphan?
Neither can see their parents.
What does an 80-year-old woman taste like?
Depends.
When the person who killed JFK heard "headshot."
When someone calls me ugly, I get sad and hug them.
I know life can be difficult for those with weak vision.
What is the chair's favorite person?
A sit-izen.
Lewis Clow
You should never leave a man hanging.
Unless they are still alive.
A lumberjack goes to a person's house.
Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.