Person jokes
What do you call the nun that hates?
For Paul Walker, Mother Teresa.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.
"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?
One stops sucking when you slap it.
Yo mama so fat, she doesn't count as 1 person bro, she counts as 40 people.
What's the difference between a dog from an Asian person and a cat from an Asian person?
Only the taste.
What do you call a disabled Chinese person?
Som Ting Wong.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.
You know you’re getting fat when you sit in the bath, and the water in the bath rises.
Please encourage me to do suicide! ;P
They say they'll stay, but I left first.
I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I?
Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?
Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.
My wife is the only person that has "missing" posters attached to her ass.
Hi, I'm cool.
I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.
If a fat person were to go on a flying car, it will just be at the ground. When they exit, it will just fly up.
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
What do you get when you cross breed a bear with a retarded person?
A feminist (a hairy and brainless beast).
What do you call a person who measures air? Airometer.