People jokes
A woman comes from a restaurant and ate a lot of beans.
When she gets home, her husband puts a blindfold on her and says not to take it off. The lady hears her husband leave the room and starts farting really loudly. When the husband comes back and takes off the blindfold, the lady sees 12 people with pegs on their noses singing happy birthday!
Most people my age have had sex. Not my fault I'm not able to fit in.
Stephen Hawking was a bit of a hardcase. He didn't let people push him around.
Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.
I'm a pilot and my boss told me to fly people to New York, so I flew them to New York and hit the towers. That was a tragic story.
In a thick Russian accent:
"Let's buy some vodka, pollute the earth with oil, and make insecure nuclear power plants that break all the time! Ah, yes. The mother land. A great place to be. Not like those stupid Ukrainian people who are living happy lives, they are crazy and need to die."
I would like to say Hitler gave two fucks about his people.
But quite Anne frankly, I'd be lying.
Why are Japanese always so skinny?
Cause last time there was a fat man, an entire city disappeared.
People said that we needed to follow in Kobe's footsteps, but there are none.
The people in the World Trade Center ordered two pepperoni, but got two planes.
Are you with Alex?
Fucking retarded. Go dig a home die, people!
People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.
If you make jokes about SH, you're not funny, and if you do, I'm gonna assume you're some 12-year-old who wants to be an edge lord. I don't really care if people get pressed.
Isn't a gaming console something people use to not be alone?
THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE 50% OF THE GAMES OFFLINE?!??!?!
What happens when there's ten people in one house and they all have to shit and there's one bathroom?
It's a motherfucking shitshow party!
The emo kid went for a high five. People say he's still hanging.
How do people eat bread?
A boy couldn't walk normally because his pants were huge, and when he went to school, the people there made so many jokes about him that he died.
IT'S NOT TRUE, JUST A FAKE JOKE, DON'T WORRY!
Bumpkin boy.
Saying a Kobe joke after he died tends to ignite a fire in the people you say it to.