whats thick 12 inches and in your mums throat my penis

What did the penis say to its pee?

Urine.

What’s the a simulation between a penis and a rubix cube

The more you play with it the harder it gets

A penis has a bad life his neighbor is asshole and his friend is pussy and his owner beats him

I was camping with my buddy and there was a fire we were roasting marrsmelows and there was a vine and tripped on it and went penis first into the fire and I said well there goes your children stupid ass

A happy mother : " Why is your sister so quiet!?!, AND HOW DID YOU GET SUPER GLUE STUCK ON YOUR PENIS!?!"

There was once a kid named Timmy. His father & mother went to bed one night and didn’t hear or see Timmy come with them. They all get under the covers Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood curdling scream. “MOMMY WATCH OUT THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!” And he proceeds to say, “DON’T WORRY MOMMY I’LL GET IT!” And he takes his fathers penis in his mouth and chomps down. Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.

one day there were these 3 cow boys sitting next to a fire and they were telling each other about their adventures well the first cow boy said i tangled with a bull that killed 6 people so i wrestled that son of a bitch to the ground with my bare hands the second cow boy said that’s nothing yesterday i was walking on a trale and came across a rattler so i picked it up ,bit its head off and drank all his venom in one gulp the third cow boy remained quiet stering the embers of the fire with his penis

Are guys scared of the word Choppiness Because it is literally saying (chop-penis)

What’s the difference between a penis and a gun?

A child doesn’t cry when a gun does off in its mouth

I did phone sex but I’ll never do it again because last time my penis got stuck in the chargin cored

How to give a good hand job?

Bop it Pull it Twist it Harder Better Faster Stronger You put your left hand in You put your left hand out You put your left hand in and shake it all about

None of you ever touch my penis

What’s the difference between a penis and a gold ball? A penis always goes in the hole.

You know a baby bottle looks kinda like a penis…also sausage and hotdogs too

you’re are mum

why is the penis so light?

Because even thots can lift them

My wife is a optimist our first night together she handed me a magnum xl condom. I didn’t know what to do so I made her a balloon animal 🎈 🦒

Lady: will you fuck me?

Man: no, I don’t have a penis.

Lady pulls down mans pants and looks in them. Yes you do! She says

Man: oh, I forgot it was there.

When your mom comes in at night then sees your… Sleeping, but sees something moving so she gets a chair and wacks it then she says" I thought it was a mouse 🐁"

Why did the two balls cross the road? To get to the penis! Sorry, too rude?

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