What's the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight?
When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren't at a UFC event, you're watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.
Patient: Doctor I feel like a needle Doctor: I see your point
What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards? DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!
I always park in handicapped spaces at the hospital Just to test their patients
Did you hear about the new pixar movie, it's about cancer patients. It's called finding Kemo
What’s the most common name for cancer patients
Luke (lukemia)
There is a man in the hospital the power went out and the man was stabbed to death, there are three witnesses, the nurse who was with another patient, the doctor who was reading some paperwork, and The Who was at the vending machine, who killed the man? The mom did because you can’t use a vending machine when the powers out!
What did the cancer patient get for Valentine's day? Candy wigs.
So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back... Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient
Doctor: u have cancer. Patient: will i survive? Doctor: prolly not
Patient number 14 was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma—a type of skin cancer. Pretty ironic how he travels. He went to terminal 14.
Me running out of the hospital after telling COVID patients to stay "positive"
Welcome to youtube.com
where we treat our patients nicely
hi
A make a wish patient wanted to see Black panther IRL so I pulled his plug
cancer jokes really grow on you - unlike the patients hair..
Q: How many more chemo treatments did the cancer patient need? A: Tumor
Dolls have wigs made of mohair, cancer patients have wigs of nohair.
The doctor gave his patient 1 day of life so he shot him then the judge gave him 15 years so there you go problem solved.
Cancer is the best thing ever! Hahah fuck all you cancer patients
The patient says, "Doctor, you've got to help me. Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.
The doctor says, "Next, please."
