Party

Party jokes

Me and my friends were having a party the other day when some bitch came bitching about the noise. Thankfully, she was hot and had a nice ass, so it was enjoyable raping her.

The next day when I woke up, I found her body only half eaten. Her lower body was still intact, so I went for seconds to fuck off the hangover. Then I had breakfast. Her ass tasted good with some ketchup.

Don't you just hate it when you're the first one to fall asleep at a sleepover, and then you hear, "Prank em, John?"

I tried dressing up as the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers for the office costume party.

It didn't land too well.

  • 1
  • How do you keep a blind kid entertained?

    You take him to a stadium crowd, then give him a bat and tell him to hit the piñata.

    A guy starts chatting to a pretty woman at a party.

    Seeing that she didn't back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That's a nice name," he said, warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?"

    "No, I named myself," she answered.

    "Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"

    "Because I like cars, and I like men," she said, looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.

    ‘BJ Titsngolf’

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  • My friends were really annoying me at my birthday party, so I decided to pop a balloon to spook them.

    Maybe going on a hot air balloon ride wasn't the best idea.

    I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited.

    Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited.

    So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?

    Q: How do you know there’s a party at Neverland Ranch? A: All the Big Wheels are parked out front.

    Q: When do you know it’s over? A: Only one is left.