Parent jokes
I arrived at work and saw a kid crying. I walked up to the kid and asked, "Hey, where are your parents?" and the kid just cried more. God, I love working at an orphanage.
I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I told my mom I wanted my first time to be special.
A man sees a small boy begging for money. He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.
The boy asks, "What gave me away?"
The man responds, "Your parents."
My dad told me to do what he did best, so I left.
what happens when you accidentally taught your child to call every man daddy?
you find the real one.
Why can't orphans watch "The Simpsons"?
Because they don't know who's Homer.
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
It's not like they'll tell their parents.
Teacher: "If you don't understand, ask your parents at home."
Orphan: "I don't have neither of those :c"
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They put her in a circle room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
What do you call it if your mom is a guy and your dad is a woman?
Transparent.
I have an orphan joke, but it needs parental guidance.
Today in 3rd grade English, the teacher asked the kids a question, "What turns on when you take your clothes off?"
Little Elsa blushed and screamed, "You can't ask that!"
The English teacher repeats the question and Elsa screams, "I'll tell my parents on you and get you fired!"
Finally, Little Tim raises his hand, "The shower, ma'am."
The English teacher clapped her hands, "Good job, Tim, and as for you Elsa, you do not have the body for that."
What do you call a cup with a handle?
A mug! HAHA ha... My parents just got a divorce :(
Why did the orphan go to church?
To hear some "foster" parenting advice.
A daughter asked her mother, “Mom, how do you spell ‘scrotum’?”
Her mom replied, “Honey, you should have asked me last night—it was on the tip of my tongue.”
I asked my Dad the other day, "At what age is it okay to have sex with girls?"
He replied, "When they leave school, son, they are legal."
Apparently, 3:15 p.m. is not what he meant.
How do terrorists feed their children?
Here comes the airplane.
What do boobs and toys have in common?
They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.
Father: I am taking your toys to the orphanage.
Son: Why?
Father: You’ll need them there.