Parent jokes

What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?

“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”

I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.

What was Michael Jackson's answer to the parents of the little boys who were left with him when asked why does he do it that way? Tell them that it's human nature.

"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.

“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.

What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?

"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"

My parents told me I was born on the highway.

Apparently that’s where most accidents happen.

You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!

Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?

When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.

As siblings, we always joke about being adopted. It stops being funny when you're playing in your parents' room and find both of your adoption papers. : )

What is an orphan's favorite song? "Lost Boy."

Why do orphans hate school?

No field trips. Parent signature_____________.

I never do dark jokes, but when I feel like it, I prefer orphan jokes, 'cause they're the safest option. I mean, what are they gonna do, call their parents?

Just hire some people to be fake parents and print off an adoption paper. On April Fools', just leave them there at the orphanage! APRIL FOOLS!

Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.

Joker gives Batman a phone.

Thomas: "Uhh, son, we need to talk... about the uhh, dressing up."

Martha: "Hello dearie, Brucie, is it ok if you visit me when you go to Joker's house?"

What do you call an orphan family tree?

A tree stump.

Why can't an orphan get married? It doesn't have its parents' blessing.

Where does an orphan come from?

Daddy getting milk.

I cried while my parents were cutting onions... onions was such a good dog.