Parent jokes

What do boobs and toys have in common?

They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.

When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.

You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!

Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?

As siblings, we always joke about being adopted. It stops being funny when you're playing in your parents' room and find both of your adoption papers. : )

What is an orphan's favorite song? "Lost Boy."

Why do orphans hate school?

No field trips. Parent signature_____________.

Just hire some people to be fake parents and print off an adoption paper. On April Fools', just leave them there at the orphanage! APRIL FOOLS!

Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.

I never do dark jokes, but when I feel like it, I prefer orphan jokes, 'cause they're the safest option. I mean, what are they gonna do, call their parents?

Joker gives Batman a phone.

Thomas: "Uhh, son, we need to talk... about the uhh, dressing up."

Martha: "Hello dearie, Brucie, is it ok if you visit me when you go to Joker's house?"

What do you call an orphan family tree?

A tree stump.

My parents told me I was born on the highway.

Apparently that’s where most accidents happen.

Why can't an orphan get married? It doesn't have its parents' blessing.

"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.

“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.

How do terrorists feed their children?

Here comes the airplane.

I cried while my parents were cutting onions... onions was such a good dog.

Why does dark humor love orphans? Because the humor killed their parents.

Go drop-kick an orphan. No one will know, not like his parents would know.

My ex was an orphan as a child.

I should have taken that as the first sign.

If her parents didn't want her, why would I?