Parent jokes
When I was watching my daughter at the park earlier, another parent asked a man, "Which one is yours?" and he replied, "I'm still choosing." She looked horrified.
Go drop-kick an orphan. No one will know, not like his parents would know.
If you're bored, pull a Technoblade, bully orphans.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why do orphans hate school?
No field trips. Parent signature_____________.
I'd tell a joke about how my mom was abusive, but I either forgot everything, or she just wasn't there.
- Mommy, I want a bicycle!
- Shut up, Sam! You've already got your wheelchair!
Parents...
One day, I was sitting on my couch watching YouTube when I heard a knock on the door. I opened the door, and to my surprise, it was my dad. I haven't seen him in 16 years, so I let him in. I noticed he had a gallon of milk in his hand, and he went to the kitchen and put the milk in the fridge.
Then he walked towards me and said, "Oh no! I forgot the cereal!" Then he walked out the door and drove away. I never saw him again.
Why can't orphans be gay? They got no one to call "daddy."
What is the difference between apples and orphans?
The apples get picked.
Why do my parents not love me? Because I've fucked 12 dogs and 7 minors while they were watching!
If the dyslexic man wanted to adopt a kid, then how could he sign the papers?
How do Asian parents name their baby?
They drop a pot down a flight of stairs.
I was walking down the streets with my parents and my sister. My mum said, "Step on a crack, break your mother's back." I stepped on a crack. My sister has been in the hospital ever since.
Why do orphans want to be gay?
So they have someone to call "Daddy."
Do you know why orphans don't have parents?
Because no one raised you.
Girl: Hey.
Orphan: Hi.
Girl: Wanna be friends?
Orphan: Sure.
Girl: Ok, and go ask your parents if we can have a sleep over.
What is the difference between you and my dad?
Nothing.
My parents gave me a blowjob. It was a blowtastic time!
So one day a boy was at his dad's work when another little boy ran in crying. Then the dad said, "Aw, little boy, are you lost? Where's your parents?" And the little boy at his dad's work said, "OMG! Dad, you can't say that!"
Why can't he say that?
Answer: He works at an orphanage.