Parent jokes

I saw a little kid cry. I went up to him and asked where his parents were. Jeez, I love working at the orphanage!

Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.

The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.

You can slap, punch, knock out an orphan, what will they do? They don't have parents!

Orphan: "I get all the A pluses and y'all bad!"

And then I told him: "If you feel so special, try telling your parents. You can't, can you?"

Bro, I was told that "LMAO" meant launching missiles at orphanages. Well, I LMAOed. I don't think they are ever gonna see their parents again.

An orphan asked his caretaker where his parents are, and the caretaker said, "A place called home."

I've been looking for my parents for years.

For the life of me, I can't remember where I hid their bodies.

Where are your parents? Oh, behind you? Not any more.

How does an orphan call his parents?

"..."

Everyone makes mistakes. Like my mom, she made a mistake 13 years ago.

Why is Dawayne so small? Because his parents cut him up into small slices!

Why can't orphans go outside?

Because their parents can't watch them!

When she says "parents aren't home" so you rush upstairs.

Teacher: Tim, where are your parents? It's been 15 minutes!

Tim (Orphan): Yeah um, they can't come.

Teacher: Why not?

Tim: They're too busy working in heaven.

Everyone makes mistakes. Just ask your parents.

Teacher: I was an orphan when I was younger.

Student: Oof.

Teacher: Is anyone not here?

Student: Yes, your parents.

I went up to an orphan and asked where their parents were--they stared.

Orphan: I finally have a father!

God: And who is that?

Orphan: You!

God: Who the hell is you? Well, it's not me.

Orphan: :l

What spooky creature has children?

Mummies.

Kid: I want to be like Batman.

Genie: I can make arrangements. The kid comes home, both of his parents are dead.

Genie: I told you.

Kid: .............................................