Outing jokes

Never drink tea in school... I give people tea if they've passed out... tea can be nice, but only have it once a day... It's not what you think... It's not tea, it's CPR.

My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.

I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.

I got kicked out of flight school, so I decided to learn from the experienced pilots (Isis).

How do you think they found out cows produce milk?

Two kids having fun in the barn.

What did the Blonde say to the other Blonde?

They don’t know; they couldn’t figure out what to say.

"One man's trash is another man's treasure" is a great thing to say to someone; horrible way to find out you're adopted.

We are coming out with a Whopper that is similar to a priest because it also has its meat between 5-year-old buns.

Your mama is so fat, by the time I swerved to miss her with the car, I ran out of gas.

Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for BLESSEDBRIAN. I think he owes it an apology.

Hey, I’m George, and this is how to figure out if someone is a psychopath.

Go into someone’s search history, and find “Cuphead ship fanfic”.

Hey George, why do you have Russia x America countryhumans?

I woke up one day to find handcuffs on my bed. Turns out, the girl I drugged yesterday escaped.

I tried to fight a razor. It cut me so deep I thought I would die.

Turns out he didn't kill me. I was never happy, but that shit made me angry.

Put Helen Keller in George Floyd's position. How would she cry out for help? Would she just moan, or would she try to do sign language?

What stresses a baby strawberry out?

When its mom is in a jam.

What do you call headphones that walk out on their children? Deadbeats.

My dad came out of my step-sister's room as I came out of my step-mum's room.

Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?

A: You give them a Sandy Hook.

I just went to India and thought, "Why do they have so many sniper hitmen?" It turns out the red dot isn't a sniper laser.

Why did the rapper take the bus to the studio?

Because their car ran out of RHYME.

Why did the rapper get kicked out of the library?

Because he was too loud with his FLOW.